Sunday, September 25, 2016

TOP 10 REASONS WHY DONALD TRUMP SHOULD BECOME A RAP SUPER STAR

TOP 10 REASONS 
WHY DONALD TRUMP SHOULD BECOME A RAP SUPER STAR

Donald Trump is an American with a plan to make America Great AGAIN. Great as FUCK is how I assume he says it behind closed doors! And with the swag of a LION Donald Trump  could make rap Great again. Like back in the 90's when Vanilla Ice was kicking that real shit. Trump himself would be a GREAT RAP Superstar due to his key genetically hardcore badassness. Let's get to the TOP 10 REASONS why Trump should become an aspiring rap artist.

10. THE HAIR - Ever since rap music was created by Mickey Heart of the Grateful Dead in 1974, hair was a big deal. Mickey Hart sported a unique style of mullet called The Freebird Mullet. Most mullets revolve around shaving the sides of your head and leaving the back to a party length of about 6 to 10 inches. With the Freebird mullet all you need is LSD and a 
Jimi Hendrix style headband and BAM you got an acid trip and a temporary mullet that last 8 to 12 hours. The 3rd time Mickey Hart tried this phantastic hairstyle he accidentally used to much LSD to keep the headband in place and entered a new dimension in which he discovered the 13 point of rapping that was needed for rap music to be created. He shared this knowledge with Wonder Mike of the Sugarhill Gang and 5 years later the world was changed forever by this new form of music called RAP thanks to the top 40 US hit Rapper's Delight by the Sugarhill Gang. I guess I got off point, but fact is that COOL hair is part of rap music. From Lil Wayne, to that dude in Kid N' Play; rap music and awesome hair is here to stay.

9. HE'S RICH - Or at least he says he is. But isn't that the point of most rap music that becomes top 10 hits? And most of the time the rappers were not rich when they recorded the hit about being a rich rap artist. And I heard this might be the case with Trump through sources like conspircy theorist ALEX JONES and Flat Earther Eric Dubay. It's also a form of practicing the black magik called THE SECRET.And isn't it ALL ABOUT DA BENJAMINS? I know there is rap with a purpose, rap that is political, rap that is spiritual, RAP WITH MEANING!! But let's face it, some of our favorite rap tracks are hits like "Got Money" by Lil Wayne, "Money Ain't A Thang" by Jermaine Dupree, and "Money,Cash, Hoes" by Illuminati Extremist Jay Z aka (The dude Tupac DID NOT LIKE AT ALL). As for Trump, he brags about his money all day long. And like most rappers he  might not actually have as much as he says he has. And that's part of the way to make $$$. Just tell people how rich you are and that becomes a business in itself because you are selling the fantasy and excitement of what it could be like to be rich and on a yacht just like in a rap music video. And to top it off; Trump's wife and daughter would make great models for any make it rain type music videos requiring hot chics in bikinis. 

8. ZERO TALENT REQUIRED - Let's face it, if you have  real talent in rap you have no chance in hell of getting famous or rich. What's great about many rap super hit singles is that you need ZERO TALENT to achieve rap super stardom.  All you need is good connections and a good producer like Dr. Dre or that weird dude from Dade County named Dj Khaled. Add some autotune and some money to make a video and BAM, you make $$$ and RAP HISTORY. Lil Trump could and should be the next big thang in Hip Hop. It's basically happening right now without him thanks to the youtube channel Shmoyoho. Trump might as well cash in on this since many people already have. And these people are not giving him a chunk of the cheese. Some might say that Trump's only talent is convincing people he has talent and big hands.It would suck if you couldn't see your own penis when masturbating, but that's another issue at hand. Get it? At hand....

7. He Is From New York - False reports show that rap music was created in New York in the late 70's. But in reality is was created in the mid 70's by Grateful Dead drummer Mickey Hart as stated above in reason 10. But that doesn't matter. New York is the MECCA of rap music. Some of the greatest rap artists are from New York. Jay Z is undeniably the best and biggest rap artist right under Tupac. Jay Z even has songs about the Big Apple. Jay Z even covered a Tupac song to try to be like Tupac. And Tupac reportedly took Beyonce's virginity when he was playing a show in Rockford, Illinois back in early 1994. But I heard that from some dude at Taco Bell so it may be only 90% true. I don't see why the dude would lie to me. He said he was a backup dancer for Biggie Smalls and had an I LOVE NY tattoo on his face. But back to the point. Being from New York and being a Billionaire will instantly rise you to the top of the rap game. Need I say more? Yes I do. Trump would be the first Caucasian rap super star out of NY and break down the walls of racism. He would be a fool not to cash in on the NY Rapper thing like Jay Z did. And Jay Z can't free style. So neither does Trump. Jay Z is just from NY and has a NY accent. SO DOES TRUMP. TRUMP Z. I like that.;-)
6. The Rap Artists Team-Ups - Imagine MC Trump doing a track with T-Pain or Snoop Dogg. Or teaming up with Drake to make a rap track about not building a wall on the Canadian border. This would destroy all racist charges against the self made billionaire. Trump doing a team up with a Canadian, African, Jew would show that it isn't about race.... it's about rape. Donald has no beef with the color of your skin! PERIOD! And teaming up with Canadian Rap Star Drake is proof enough thanks to acknowledging that he didn't wanna build a wall on the Canadian border where black Jews live side by side with odd white people that sometimes speak French. He believes Mexicans are rapist. Has nothing to do with skin color. He never said they are dark skinned. Hear for yourself. 


5. It Would Be A "BIG" Success - If and when Trump announces his debut album featuring all the rap superstars, including holographic Tupac, it WILL be a BIG success. The idea is a winner and Trump likes winners and especially when the winner is himself. This can and should be another notch on his belt of success. He can claim to be the King of Rap and the Biggest, most Popular Rapper, and richest Rap Star in HISTORY. He could loose $$$ on the album and still claim to be the richest rapper alive. Truth is that if Trump made a rap track he would instantly be the richest rapper alive. But we know he doesn't like to loose money. But this is about being a RAP STAR. The only reasons why his Casinos failed was because America wasn't being GREAT at the time. Trump is here to fix that bullshit. Trump is over it (The Casino Failures which wasn't his fault) and moved on. Trump seems ready to take on an easier battle than President of the United States and that is to be the WORLD'S GREATEST RAPPER ALIVE.
4. A Distinctive Rap Voice - We already know Trump sounds GREAT when he is autotuned. His voice is the most distinctive voice on the planet besides Tupac. Unlike Drake, Trump can jump into the rap game without having to sound like Lil Wayne. His voice has the power to stand alone in a track and everyone across the Flat Earth (I found this out from rapper BOB) would know it's him. Drake has in recent years developed Lil Wayne's sound and style into his own. But he still sounds like little Wayne but super weird like Lil Wayne on 5 Xannax footballs. Trump will not have to go through a 10 year vigorous process of ripping off an already famous voice to gain his own style. Nope, NOT AT ALL. Instead Trump jumps in the game with an already bad ass voice that is distinctly his own. Kinda like 50 Cents'. Not to dis on Drake, but all Canadians do that shit to get to the top of whatever it is they do. It's part of not being GREAT and Canadian. In all honesty, Trump's voice could help people like Drake believe in themselves. This could lead to Drake having a song called, "I'm From Canada Eh".
3. He Can Afford A Gold Plated Tower - This is not a far stretch at all in this top 10 list. It's still relevant to this day in Rap MUSIC that having NO LIMIT in this rap game requires plating shit in gold. I'll get to plating your teeth gold in a second. One of the GREATEST, RICHEST, AND UHHHH Rappers of all time is MASTER P. In 1998 Mater P was all about making things BIG. I mean REALLY BIG. In Master P's 2nd break out hit after "Make Crack Like This" he released a song "Make Em Say Uhh" that created the GOLD STANDARD aka The Status Symbol of Rap Super Stars, which is plating the biggest thing you can in GOLD. Watch the "Make Em Say Uhh" music video and see for yourself. Trump can afford to take this one step furthur and plate the Trump Tower gold. The song could even be called "Make Em Say Big, REALLY Big Sha Na Na na". Trump could potentially plate the White House gold if he wins the 2016 Presidency. And winning is all he does so please do expect this to happen over anything else in life! Every cabinet member could be afforded gold grills for their mouths and service vehicles. Now that I think of it, Master P could make No limit BIG again by signing Master Trump. Wait.. that sounds bad. whatever. They have so much in common I am surprised Trump did not pick Master P for VP. There is a picture of Master P with Hillary Clinton from his Walmart exclusive rap album titled HIP HOP HISTORY. Hillary's email scandal truly revolves around covering this picture up. It is the RAREST rap album in history. 
2. He Has A Lot Of Enemies -  You can not be the KING OF RAP without having at least 5 known enemies. It's called BEEF in the world of rap and their is a line of movies dedicated to beef called BEEF. Trump had a beef company called Trump Steaks. It was a big hit and I mean really BIG with a few people, but at the time it had no chance because of the influx of Green Peace Environmentalist Terrorist of the 1990's. And let's face it, no one has more enemies than Trump. I take that back, Hillary Clinton has DOUBLE, but Obama comes in a clean 4th right after George W. Bush. This will inevitably lead to a DVD or straight to NETFLIX BEEF MOVIE Featuring Trump vs. Kanye West and many others. And the line of BEEF movies are extremely important to being a REAL RAP SUPER STAR. You can not be one of the BEST without being in a BEEF Movie with yourself as the STAR. Here is what I think the cover of BEEF would look like with Trump. >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

1. The Tupac Effect - I pray to the Goddess of Atheism that Trump never gets shot. Violence is not cool. And that's why Trump wants to build a wall. It's a safe and humane alternative to Nuking Mexico. But it is cool to get shot in the rap game but even super cooler to die by the gun. You get mad eternal street cred. Since so many Mexicans and Liberal Transgender Feminist vowed to kill him he might as well cash on this fact for the future of his families wealth. What I mean is he can make money off of this, I mean BIG MONEY.  If he becomes President and makes a rap album before some asshole kills him he will then for sure go down in Rap History like Tupac. He might as well get a tattoo sayings he knew he was gonna die before he died. And if he had some hidden tracks to be released after his death, then the Trump family can make $$$$ for endless years to come just like Tupac's mom. I am not exactly sure if I am voting for Trump or Deez Nuts but I am pretty sure it's gonna be Deez Nuts. But if Deez Nuts dies before the 2016 election I will fore sure vote for Trump. If he was smart he would release a rap album before his debate.This could stop the evil UN witch (HIllary Rodinmyass Clinton) by winning the youth vote. I pray she gets help for her medical condition of coughing up baby alien lizard people. I'd prescribe to her bleach. But medical marijuana might be a safe alternative. The CBD's  found in marijuana are known to cure everything. Maybe even what Hillary has?? See Hillary cough up an alien in this extreme video. 



Thanks For Reading My First Top 10 Blog

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